When it comes to locker rooms, I like 'em just like my mother's bathing suits: I only wanna see 'em in one piece.
Ted Lasso in Ted LassoEarly drinkin’ means quick drunken.
Ted Lasso in Ted LassoHey, takin' on a challenge is a lot like ridin' a horse. If you're comfortable while you're doin' it, you're probably doin' it wrong.
Ted Lasso in Ted LassoThat right there, that's a scone. Tastes like a muffin except it sucks all the spit out of your mouth.
Ted Lasso in Ted LassoTies and no playoffs? Why do you even do this?
Ted Lasso in Ted Lasso"How do you take your tea?"
Ted: "Well, normally right back to the counter because there's been a terrible mistake."
Rebecca: "So, I spoke to the owner of The Sun."
Ted: "You spoke to God?!"
Rebecca: "No, the newspaper."
You know what the happiest animal in the world is? It's a goldfish. It's got a 10 second memory. Be a goldfish!
Ted Lasso in Ted LassoI think I literally have a better understanding of who killed Kennedy than what is offside.
Ted Lasso in Ted LassoGeorge: "I love what you done with the place. Did you do it yourself, or did you get some pouf to help ya?"
Rebecca: "I could ask the same of your hair."
Will you explain to me how that was offside? No, I'm asking you, seriously. Explain offside to me! It makes no sense.
Ted Lasso in Ted LassoYou know, I always thought that tea was going to taste like hot brown water, and you know what? I was right. It's horrible.
Ted Lasso in Ted Lasso