Die besten Zitate und Sprüche aus Shrek

Fiona: "It talks?"
Shrek: "Yeah, but it's getting him to shut up that's the trick."

Donkey: "So where is this fire-breathin' pain in the neck, anyway?"
Shrek: "In the tower, waiting for us to rescue her."
Donkey: "I was talkin' about the dragon, Shrek."

Shrek: "Ogres are like onions."
Donkey: "They stink?"
Shrek: "No. Layers. Onions have layers. Ogres have layers."

You're not that ugly. All right, you are ugly. But you're only like this at night. Shrek's ugly 24/7.

Some of you may die, but it's a sacrifice I'm willing to make.

"I like an honest fight and a saucy little maid…"
"What he's basically saying is he likes to get…"
"...paid!"

I hope you heard that. She called me a noble steed. She thinks I'm a steed.

Shrek: "If I treat you so badly, then why are you still here?"
Donkey: "Because that's what friends do, they forgive each other."

I hate it when you've got someone in your face, you try to give someone a hint and they won't leave, and then there's that big awkward silence...
...Can I stay with you?

Donkey: "Whoa. Look at that. Who'd wanna live in a place like that?"
Shrek: "That would be my home."
Donkey: "Oh and it is lovely. You know, you're really quite a decorator. It's amazing what you've done with such a modest budget. I like that boulder. That is a nice boulder."

Shrek: "Well it's no wonder you don't have any friends."
Donkey: "Wow, only a true friend would be that truly honest."

Wow, that was really scary and if you don't mind me saying, if that don't work, your breath will certainly get the job done, 'cause you definitely need some Tic Tacs or something, 'cause your breath stinks.

And then one time I ate some rotten berries. Man, there were some strong gases eeking outta my butt that day.

Donkey: "Whoa. Look at that. Who'd wanna live in a place like that?"
Shrek: "That would be my home."

Hey now, you're an all star
Get your game on, go play
Hey now, you're a rock star
Get the show on, get paid
And all that glitters is gold
Only shootin' stars break the mold

Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me
I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed
She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb
In the shape of an "L" on her forehead

There's a natural connection between me and DreamWorks. I don't know if you know this, but my ears were one of the inspirations for Shrek.

Neville: "I like Shrek."
Anna: "You're not so good with people anymore, are you?"

Anyone who tells you fatherhood is the greatest thing that can happen to you, they are understating it.

Canada is a country of ingredients without a cuisine; we're a country with musicians without an indigenous instrument; Toronto's a city that doesn't even have a dish named after it.

I like smart jokes, I like dumb jokes, and I like dumb jokes done smartly.

I'm a comedic actor, not to mix words, but it's something I think about. A comedic actor. I like to think that Christopher Guest, Phil Hartman, Peter Sellers and Alec Guinness are comedic actors. And Dan Aykroyd, too. Those are my heroes.

I would love to be a father. I had a great father who taught me how gratifying that is. I'm not going to deny myself that. I think I'd be good at it. Everybody wants that experience. I definitely do.

I'm like every other woman: a closet full of clothes, but nothing to wear: So I wear jeans.

I think that anything that you do, any accomplishment that you make, you have to work for. And I've worked very hard in the last ten years of my life, definitely, and I can tell you that hard work pays off. It's not just a cliche.

I'd kiss a frog even if there was no promise of a Prince Charming popping out of it. I love frogs.

No villain thinks of himself as a villain, and that's the approach I always take.

I'm a con artist in that I'm an actor. I make people believe something is real when they know perfectly well it isn't.

There's nothing like spending an evening with an audience every night.

Powerful people are always in charge. You have to acknowledge that and deal with it as a reality. They're not devils. They're not monsters. They're human beings, like us, that have their share of insecurities and fears. You have to contemplate that as you go through life.

Take care, be kind, be considerate of other people and other species, and be loving.

I want to let you know that there is a definitive blueprint that you can follow to achieve success, prosperity, longevity and peace of mind. I've followed it my whole career. It's very simple, just do these three things: pay your taxes, mind your business and keep Will Smith's wife's name out of your f*cking mouth!

I can figure out which Spice Girl I wanna impregnate.

White boys always get the Oscar. It's a known fact. Did I ever get a nomination? No! You know why? Cause I hadn't played any of them slave roles, and get my ass whipped. That's how you get the nomination as a black dude.

Anything you have to "acquire a taste for" was not meant to be eaten.

The advice I would give to someone is to not take anyone's advice.

Well, the years start comin' and they don't stop comin'
Fed to the rules and I hit the ground runnin'
Didn't make sense not to live for fun
Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb

So don't delay, act now, supplies are running out
Allow, if you're still alive, six to eight years to arrive
And if you follow, there may be a tomorrow
But if the offer's shunned
You might as well be walkin' on the sun

For the world has changed, and we must change with it.

The world is quieter now. We just have to listen. If we listen, we can hear God's plan.

And so I grew from colt to stallion, as wild and as reckless as thunder over the land. Racing with the eagle, soaring with the wind. Flying? There were times I believed I could.

You are too concerned with what was and what will be. There's a saying: "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the 'present'."

This is Berk. Boasting the kind of balmy, fun-in-the-sun climate that will give you frostbite on your spleen.

Happiness is inside all of us. Sometimes you just need someone to help you find it.

The difference between try and triumph is just a little "umph"!