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Jogging is the worst. I know it keeps you healthy, but God, at what cost?

One time my refrigerator stopped working. I didn't know what to do. I just moved.

I once worked with a guy for three years and never learned his name. Best friend I ever had. We still never talk sometimes.

What I hear when I'm being yelled at is people caring really loudly at me.

I'm big enough to admit that I am often inspired by myself.

I'm going to tell you a secret about everyone else's job: no one knows what they are doing. Deep down, everyone is just faking it until they figure it out.

No matter what I do, literally nothing bad can happen to me. I'm like a white, male U.S. Senator.

I don't want to be overdramatic, but today felt like a hundred years in hell and the absolute worst day of my life.

I stand behind my decision to avoid salad and other disgusting things.

Halloween is my favorite holiday. It's just the best. And I don't have to work! Hey slutty teenage girls dressed as sexy kittens, pump your own stomachs this year!

There's only one thing I hate more than lying: skim milk. Which is water that is lying about being milk.

There has never been a sadness that can't be cured by breakfast food.

I had to call in a few favors. But if you don't call in favors to look at women in bikinis and assign them numerical grades, what the hell do you call in favors for?

I'm like an elephant, okay? If I walk into a room, it's like, okay, he's in there.

I wasn't listening but I strongly disagree with Ann.

Sometimes you gotta work a little so you can ball a lot.

Time is money; Money is power; Power is pizza; Pizza is knowledge. Let's go!

We have to remember what's important in life: friends, waffles, and work. Or waffles, friends, work. But work has to come third.

Everything hurts and I'm dying.

Idaho cut their parks department by 80 percent. And Idaho is basically one giant park.

Rachel: "I barely remember anything from that night, except for that you're from South Carolina, you have a younger brother, your dad's a doctor, and you went to a public high school for students, gifted in math and science."
Dev: "Yeah. But don't you feel like those are just assumptions you can make about any Indian person?"

I feel like there should be an app that analyzes your tum and tells you what you want to eat.

Long term relationships are tough. You can't just expect a big, roaring fire right away, right? You know, you can't put the big logs in first. You start with the small stuff. Kindling, all right? Then you add that, then you put in the big logs and then you have a roaring fire. And that's a good relationship. But be careful, sometimes kindling is hard to find, you know? Good wood. So, don't take it for granted.

Dev: "You see The Social Network? Max Minghella plays an Indian guy. He's white. They browned him up."
Ravi: "No no, I read he's one-sixteenth Indian."
Dev: "Who cares? If you go back far enough we're all one-sixteenth something. I'm probably one-sixteenth black. You think they're gonna let me play Blade?"

Going to Whole Foods, want me to pick you up anything?

Why do they call it Plan B? I mean, is Plan A having the kid? That's a terrible plan.

"Did they live happily ever after?"
"I don't know about ever after, but they're pretty happy now."

No, I just wanted to do one dinner. I don't want, like, a serious relationship with my father.

Your IMDb page is full of Indian stereotypes.

Diese Welt ist erbarmungslos, aber gleichzeitig unfassbar schön.

This world is merciless, and it's also very beautiful.

Egal wie es ausgeht, ich habe das Gefühl, dass ich damit klar kommen kann. Keiner von uns ist böse. Wir hatten einfach keine Wahl. Denn die Welt ist einfach unglaublich grausam.

Je heller ein Feuer leuchtet, desto schneller brennt es nieder.

The brighter a lady shines, the faster she may burn.

Heute ist ein äußerst wichtiger Tag, auch, wenn ihn manche fürchten. Denn heute werden Londons junge, heiratswillige Damen ihrer Majestät, der Königin, vorgestellt. Gott sei ihren armen Seelen gnädig!

Today is a most important day, and for some a terrifying one, for today is the day London's marriage-minded misses are presented to her Majesty the Queen. May God have mercy on their souls.

Alright everyone. First, we must win. After, I'll be glad to fix any clothes, hair, or broken spirits.

This place tastes like many emotions. Excitement, anger, joy and... salty? Is salty a feeling?

The memories I stitch here will be my own.

Fancy blades, Irelia. Let me test my scissors against them!

These turrets look strong, it will be quite fun cutting them down!

Head high, chin up, scissors ready!

Bits of fabric can become something beautiful. My work here can do just the same.

Yasuo, your clothes are truly terrible.

Vayne, don't let your hatred affect your aim.

If Neeko can be everyone, how can Neeko be sure she's anyone?

How can anybody miss home? Home is all around.

Words are tricky. Better to speak with colors and emotion.

No more room for problems please. Only room for more cheesebreads.

Every place is beautiful. Every place is danger. Is danger beautiful?

The air is part of me. So are the flowers and the rocks. Neeko is everywhere.

Life as Garen just simple. Just swing sword around. Very bland, yes.

So beautiful! Like moonlight on fresh snow.