Die schönsten Filmzitate (Seite 2)

"My enemy's identity has been revealed. I know very well who is after me. Imagine such a tricky enemy that you never know it's your enemy. But I now know what it is."
"Who is it?"
"Time!"

Männer! in drei Wochen werde ich meine Ernte einfahren. Stellt euch vor, wo ihr sein werdet und so wird es geschehen. Bleibt in Formation und bleibt an meiner Seite! Und wer sich wiederfindet, über grüne Wiesen reitend, die Sonne im Gesicht, sollte nicht verwundert sein, denn er ist im Elysium und ist bereits tot! Brüder, in der Ewigkeit wird man sich eurer Taten erinnern!

Fratres! Three weeks from now, I will be harvesting my crops. Imagine where you will be, and it will be so. Hold the line! Stay with me! If you find yourself alone, riding in green fields with the sun on your face, do not be troubled. For you are in Elysium, and you're already dead! Brothers, what we do in life... echoes in eternity!

Fass ihn nicht an, sonst bist du tot! Oh, tut mir leid, der ist absolut ungefährlich. Komm mit, Mario. Pilz Königreich - wir kommen!

Do not touch that mushroom, you die! Oh, I'm sorry, that one's perfectly fine. Come on, Mario. Mushroom Kingdom - here we come!

"Das war nur ein Vorgeschmack auf unseren Zorn. Ergebt ihr euch?"
Bowser: "Das tu ich nicht."

"That is but a taste of our fury. Do you yield?"
Bowser: "I do not."

Nemo: "You said we weren't here to have fun."
Flip: "I said, you're not here to have fun. If I'm not having fun, I'm doing my job wrong."

No dream lasts forever. Sooner or later, it's time to wake up.

Rule number one, stay focused. If you slip up, you'll never see the waking world again.
Rule number two, keep a low profile. We're not here to have fun.

Teacher: "Are you excited for your first day of school?"
Nema: "My dad said schools are basically prisons."
Teacher: "School is not a prison."
Nema: "Can I leave whenever I want to?"
Teacher: "It's a little like a prison..."

Every Kami, young and old, must work together to defend our mountain from the Oni.

We Kami face a grave situation. Every hundred years the evil Oni will breach our village and devour us alive!

Bartender: "You ain't driving, are you?"
Santa: "I steer a little, but the reindeer do most of the work."

You have $300 million in your personal vault. That's what I want for Christmas.

"This is my forth year as a Santa. How about you?"
"I started the whole damn thing."

Santa Claus is coming to town. Time for some seasons beatings.

Trudy: "And what do you do to the naughty ones?"
Santa: "I give them a lump of coal."

Who is he? Cause it's not your typical mall Santa.

All right, revelers. Welcome to your worst Christmas ever!

Whiskey. Single Malt. 18 Jahre alt, so wie ich es mag.

I got some scotch. Aged eighteen years. The way I like it.

Wir sagen deiner Mutter einfach, wir hätten alles aufgegessen.

We'll just tell your mother that... we ate it all.

Vicky: "Es muss absolut perfekt sein. Ich möchte, dass es zur richtigen Zeit am richtigen Ort passiert."
Jessica: "Vicky, es geht hier um Sex, nicht um den Start einer Rakete."

Vicky: "I want it to be the right time, the right place."
Jessica: "It's not a space shuttle launch, it's sex."

"Dude that chick's a MILF!"
"What to hell is that?"
"M-I-L-F: Mom I'd like to f-ck!"

My brother said by the end of the summer I'll get the big picture. And I see it. No matter what, times change, things are different. But the problem is, I don't want them to be.

When a girl tells you how many guys she's slept with, multiply it by three and that's the real number. Didn't you f-ckers learn anything in college?

Wenn ein Kerl zu dir sagt, er hätte mit drei Frauen geschlafen, war's in Wirklichkeit nur eine. Du musst die Anzahl immer durch drei dividieren. Fast so exakt wie ne Wissenschaft.

If a guy tells you how many girls he's hooked up with, it's not even close to that. You take that number and divide it by three, then you get the real total. OK, so if Kevin is saying it's been three girls it's more like one or none. The rule of three. It's an exact science. Consistent as gravity.

It's like banging a tennis ball against a brick wall, which can be fun. What you want is a partner to return the ball.

Wow, Steve Stifler just gave a rose to a girl and meant it. It's like, monkeys learning to use tools for the first time.

Du kannst nicht einfach drauflos fummeln. Oh nein, du musst den Ofen anheizen, bevor du den Truthahn rein stellst.

No, you dingbat. You don't just go groping away. You gotta pre-heat the oven before you stick in the turkey.

Finch: "So, ah, would you object if I said you were quite striking?"
Stifler's Mom: "Mister Finch, are you trying to seduce me?"

Stifler's Mom: "You've got to know I'm over you, Finchy."
Finch: "Well, as they say, we'll always have Paris."
Stifler's Mom: "And the pool table."
Finch: "And the car."
Stifler's Mom: "And the two-room suite I have upstairs."

Finch: "Oh, Jeanine!"
Jeanine: "Call me Stifler's Mom!"

Jim, get some f-cking balls. If you can't bring yourself to photograph a naked chick, how the hell are you ever gonna sleep with one?

Und ich bekenne mich schuldig, dass ich doch sehr häufig... masturbiert habe, als ich noch ein klein wenig jünger war. Ich nannte es immer "die Salami streicheln". Mit Backwaren hab ich's allerdings nie getrieben. Dein Onkel Mort hat mindestens fünf bis sechs mal mit seiner Schlange gespielt.

I have to admit, I did the fair bit of... masturbating when I was a little younger. I used to call it "stroking the salami", you know, "pounding the old pud". I never did it with baked goods. But you know your uncle Mort, he "pets the one-eyed snake" five, six times a day.

She's gone! Oh my God, she used me. I was used. I was used! Cool!

Jim, can't you keep your shirt on? You're scaring the chicks away!

Hi, I'm Jim's Dad. You must be the parents of this young lady. I didn't get your daughter's name, but hopefully my son did.

Guys, uh, what exactly does third base feel like?

Jim: "Here's an easy one, okay: 'Attractive single white female, fun-loving, youthful mind seeks outgoing companion.' Attractive: ugly."
Oz: "Fun-loving: insane."
Kevin: "Unlisted age plus 'youthful mind' equals 'Old'."
Jim: "No, 'charming' is old. 'Older' is really old. 'Youthful mind' is dead."

Wie wär's wenn ihr Jungs eure Schwänze entdeckt, die Einschweißfolie aufreißt und sie verdammt nochmal benutzt!

I say, why don't you guys locate your d-cks, remove the shrink wrap, and f-cking use them!

Jim: "Look, maybe we should give him a chance. You know, I think that underneath all the 'f-cks' and 'shits' and 'blow me's', there's a very sensitive person who's just thirsty for acceptance. That's... that's what I think."
Michelle: "Oh, Jim... you gotta stop mast-rbating... it's melting your brain."

Michelle: "How did a little perv like you, turn into such a great guy?"
Jim: "How did a little nympho like you, turn into such a great girl?"
Michelle: "I'm still a nympho."
Jim: "Well, I'm still a perv."

You've gotta control yourself and think of something non-sexual. I haven't even touched you yet and you're turning into the Sears Tower.

Finch: "Das sind meine Leute. Lass mich das machen."
Stifler: "Sind die schwul?"
Finch: "Nein, du beschissener Vollhirni, sie haben Stil, sie sind kultiviert, sie sind gebildet."
Stifler: "Also doch schwul."

Finch: "Let me handle this. These are my people."
Stifler: "They're gay?"
Finch: "No, you bleating imbecile. They have style, they're cultured, they're sophisticated."
Stifler: "So, they're gay."

I would like to make an announcement - there is a gorgeous woman mast-rbating on my bed!

Außer dir kenn' ich keinen, der für sein Teil 'ne Bedienungsanleitung braucht.

Jim, you're the only guy I know who's d-ck needs an instruction manual.

You realise we're all going to go to college as virgins. They probably have special dorms for people like us.

Jim's Dad: "Why do you think, uh, Michelle, they call it 'making love'?"
Michelle: "I don't know. I just call it 'boning'."
Jim's Dad: "Boning? Well, when you're doing other things with Jim, when you're not... um... boning, how does he make you feel?"
Michelle: "Horny, like I wanna bone."
Jim's Dad: "But, we can't be boning from sunrise to sunset, dear."
Michelle: "Oh, you've never tried it?"
Jim's Dad: "I certainly have. I have. I've boned... from sunrise, uh, right through brunch on more than one occasion."

Oh Ja. Der Stifmeister kommt wieder nach Grand Harbor. Sei auf Zack, kack dir nicht in den Truck, wisch mir den Arsch und leck mir den Sack. Achtung, Stifler kommt. Baby!

Oh, yeah. The Stifmeister's coming back to Grand Harbor. Deck the halls. Bye-bye, Great Falls. Wipe my ass and lick my balls. It's Stifler time, baby!

Oz: "All you got to do is to ask them questions, and listen to what they have to say and shit."
Stifler: "I dunno, man, that... sounds like a lot of work!"

Stifler: "Mother f-cker!"
Finch: "Yes I am."
Stifler: "Oh, you son of a b-tch!"

No longer will our penises remain flaccid and unused! From now on, we fight for every man out there who isn't getting laid when he should be! This is our day! This is our time! And, by God, we're not gonna let history condemn us to celibacy! We will make a stand! We will succeed! We will get laid!