I was a dishwasher at one of those Japanese places that cook on your table. Not too fun.
Aziz AnsariA lot of people my age think stand up sucks.
Aziz AnsariDo It Under the Influence Yourself! That's what we're shooting for! Get drunk and make your dreams come true.
Aziz AnsariEvery time I've done comedy in, like, traditional comedy clubs, there's always these comedians that do really well with audiences but that the other comedians hate because they're just, you know, doing kind of cheap stuff like dancing around or doing, like, very kind of base sex humor a lot, and stuff like that.
Aziz AnsariFor the majority of the time, I may as well have been just a really tan white kid. You know, I may as well have just been, like, a fat kid.
Aziz Ansari